I am not a big dreamer of a fairy tale wedding, never have been. For no particular reason, it just not very me. However, a few weeks before my op and a few weeks of being engaged, I went, under the duress of my Mum, to try on wedding dresses.
This was my one opportunity to see what I would look like with my natural figure in a wedding dress. I think my Mum’s smile out shone the entire bridal shop every time I stepped out in a new dress, it was a surreal experience. But a good one. The final dress, was when my smile out shone my Mum’s. It is beautiful, it is different and well, it is my wedding dress. I think was the first step to feeling like a bride.
At the moment, and for a few months to come I will be unable to go back to try it on, order and send off measurements. The weight and clamping of the dress would be too much at present on my new body. Also, I need to wait 6 months until my new breasts have settled. An ill-fitting dress on the day would not be ideal! The question is, will it still be ‘the’ dress? Or, ‘my dress’? Will it look the same or feel the same?
I hope I look the same and get that rush again. I wouldn't admit it out loud, but I liked feeling like a bride for that moment in time. I suppose we will not know until the day comes where I brave the bridal shop once more. An exciting but anxious time.
It would be a productive use of my current time at home resting to plan the wedding. Clearly I do not have the fairy tale wedding gene, bloody genes, they have not done me too well as of yet!